Thoughts

We are pilgrims in this world, passers by, journeying to our true home, the Father’s kingdom.

Our citizenship is in heaven, we are in this world but we do not belong to it.  Our stay here is temporary.

Gelo, Tatay, Nanay, Aunty Lyd, Uncle Tim, Uncle Aloy, Mama Flor, Papa Doods and the others who have gone ahead. One day I will be joining them.

Death of a love one is like a bee sting.  A bee sting cannot kill you but It can hurt you and makes you afraid to be hurt.  I was first hurt by its sting when my mother passed away in 1994. Previous stings did not hurt as much such as Anty Lyds, though she was close to me but did not hurt so much, as well as grandpa, Lolo Pedro. Tatay’s (father's) death hurt me also but death most stinged me when Gelo, my son, my first born, passed away.  I saw his life ebb away on his death bed at the ICU of the hospital.  With all those apparatus connected to his body.  Nothing hurt as much as seeing your son in pain, disease ravaging his body and you can’t do anything to alleviate his suffering.

My son’s death left a void in my heart and in my life and I know is true also to my wife, his mother.  The degree of hurt may not be the same, but it still is the same hurt, the same pain, the same void. 

We tried filling it but at the end of the day, it still is empty, hollow. Only God can fill that void, nothing else will.

Lord have mercy on us.